Things juz started 2 heat up. Tot everything gona b fine when I woke up in d morning. But I guess things happen unexpectedly...
Yesterday, 7pm,I was all ready 2 go out wit my gurl-frens..It was actually 4 Sharon, whos flying 2 Australia 2mrw 2 persue her study(duno taking wat)...We planned 2 have dinner, watch muvie o mayb shopping(2gether 4 1 last time, b4 she came bck)...But d moment I came down, mom started 2 ask all d question dat she could tink of..Den dad start 2 bomb me..Coz tiz actually my 1st time go out at nite(Yeah...It suxx,but its d obedient-guai gurl here)..Ok lo..Wait 4 him bomb finish 1st loo...I hate myself dat time...4 not answering him, defend myself...But how couldI?? I never goes against dem..I respect dem so much dat I dun have d guts 2 say a word!!So u could guess how my life is..I waited on d sofa (eyes on tv,pretending 2 watch d cartoon, whilst mind on sumthing else *goin out*)....Mummy sit on other sofa ignoring me!!! Damn!!! I hate when shes lyk dat..*errrgghh!!* Suddenly she burst out [again]"Y do u wanna go out so late??" ,"J not goin oso..","Y do u do thing without asking permission", "who r u goin out wit n where u go??" , "wat time cum home??" ..blaa..blaa..Dat really gets on my nerves..J is not goin coz she ordy wen out wit sharon dat afternun, so i guess her mom dun allow her 2 stay 'outside' 2 long..But me?? I hvnt gone out since last week!!! DAMN!!! Bout asking permission..Duh!! As if u cared!! I did ask u while we're at kpg on Sun, in front of aunty!! But did u hear a word I say?? No!! U juz ignored me lyk wat u owes did...Dat wasnt d 1st time..I was wondering..Y shud I ask when u never cared??
Tot she'd send me after knowin everything she wana noe..By dat time,I was hoping her 2 get d car key n drive me out b4 my dad start bombing me agiain..But instead she went up d stairs n never cum dwn... :'( *owez looking at d clock* waited mummy 2 cum dwn(mayb she take bath)..But never..Dad again startd 2 nag me.. " U ah..Wat happen 2 u?? Ppl say go out, u say OK...Y cant u say no?? U wana follow G(me bro), go out den cum bck midnite?? Lyk dat izit?? U tu ppuan...Dun ever thing of such thing...Ppl outder bkn bgs punya..All taik,menganggur..Wat u wana do?? Jual urself?? Dun try 2 cheat me..I noe wats gin on..Now I noe u pandei carik kwn frm internet..Sampei dtg ambk u depan rmh...D nxt time I see dat kancil putih...Siap u!! (Sorry O, boh ambk hati..I never meant 2 libatkan u)...If i ever found out anythin...Jaga u!! U go out frm tiz hse!!" Blaa..bblaaa....C?? Wat d hell is on hes mind?? Not dat I go out everynite...Everyday pun x...Dat was like once-a-week-out 2 njoy myself!! But he never understand!! Wat will I be??! Wat do u tink?? N wat will u find out?? Dat im a prostitute??A drug pusher?? A junkies?? A whore?? A biatch??? DUH!! I dun even smoke 4 GOD's sake!! N tiz is wat I get 4 being d gud-obedient-respectful gurl who owes stay at home...If lyk tiz..I'd rather b 1(listed juz now)...DAMN!!!! LIFE SUXX!!
Get my fon n msg P saying dat I cant go...[Coz my parent dun bother 2 send me!!] I was so pist...Ran up 2 my room, change..n CRIED!! Cried d whole nite..Gosh!! How could dey do tiz 2 me?? Wat have I done?? I never cum dwn afterdat, 'diet' whole nite..Wasnt hugry tho..Cried till Im out of tears..Keep asking god wat de hell is goin on..Even tot of doin stupid stuff..Wat bout taking my own life away?? Lots of sharp objects lying around...N colourful-weird looking medicine everywhere...No kidding!! Wats d point after all?? Im so tired of tiz shit!! Soon I dozed of till morning...
hey... things will get better.. really.. they'll learn to trust you and everything will be okay. don't even think about those stuff. believe me, when i was young i ever thought about it. but if you really do it you'll regret. cos you'll realise life is so lovely after all. parents DO love you. no matter what. maybe the way they express themselves is wrong but if something happened to you, they'd regret their whole lives. and you'd waste your life. 17 years and there's still 60 or more years to go. :D it's not even half of it yet. cannot sacrifice those years without knowing what will happen.
ReplyDeletei never thought of those stuff leh. probably cos i'm too happy-go-lucky?
ReplyDeleteaiya.. u never sad one la. cry also cos eyes tired. -.-
ReplyDeletehermmm....i've been where u are. Used to get long lectures from my parents. But u must know one thing, it's not that they dont want u to go out, perhaps they are just worried that bad things might happen to you. Parents always have one thing in mind which is to protect us from all possible harm, but somehow some parents do go to the extreme. It depends on how they view things. My parents never really like me going out at night even though i am almost 24 now, so i always go out during the day. However, as i grow older they gradually allow me to take responsibility of myself. They allow me to go out at nigh but i must be back on time. I guess everthing must have it's limits. I'd say just wait a few more years and i'm sure your parents will let u go out at night, and if u do please take good care of yourself. Its rather unfair that we girls have to take extra percautions but girls are more prone to be victims of unwanted happenings. That is the reason why most parents dont really allow their daughters to go out until late at night.
ReplyDeleteWhat in the hell? What language is this? I can't understand one thing you're trying to say.
ReplyDelete